An idea!

PL

Lately I've been thinking about something...

I've mentioned the negativity detox last week. I've been doing sort of okay with that (could be better and will be). I've been thinking I should do a real full body detox. Not a cleanse, not just a good long soak (though both of those sound appealing), but a real-life detox top to bottom, from the rooter to the tooter, so to speak. 

Lately, I've just been thinking about how good it would feel to focus on one part of me at a time and just devote time to care for it. For example, a week of intentionally caring for my skin intensely, or my liver etc. Does that sound insane?

I already care for myself pretty well, but I could definitely do better. I don't really "treat" myself the way I'd really like to, either. Plus there are so many awesome ideas on Pinterest for DIY spa crafts! So, and bear with me here, I thought I'd cull together six treatments/detoxes/etc. to try focused on one area at a time for a week to a week and a half at a time. I know some will stick and help me to maintain long term self-care. Here are some of the things I want to research to work on.

*Lungs

*Skin

*Eyes

*Liver

*Hands & Feet

*Muscles

*Heart

*Digestive Tract

*Mind

*Sinuses

*Throat/Voice/Esophagus

What do you think? Think you'd want to try to focus on caring for your body in such a manner? I think no matter what you do, as long as you care for your body, your body (mind and spirit) will show its appreciation. 

Stay tuned on what I end up doing! I hope you have a truly wonderful day, buds!

And now for something completely different!

A few months ago (probably around the beginning of Autumn), I kept noticing a product pop up on my Pinterest. It was a face mask that the "pinners" claimed did all kinds of wonderful for the skin. After seeing it week after week, I started getting curious. I have an odd focus like that. It takes a while to get my attention but when it does, I'm a terrier about finding out about it. And so I did!

The product is called GlamGlow and it's a face mask. All the pictures made the users of it look like their faces were robin's eggs. Pale blue and freckled. I was intrigued. I have done enough damage to my skin in my 20's, I kept thinking now would be the best time to try it out and see if it could aid some of the issues I was aggravated by (enlarged pores).

Well, as things go, I have a tendency to put my needs (or wants in this situation) on hold while I find a million excuses to put whatever it was I was wanting or needing on the back burner. Then a few weeks ago, I'd just had it. I found myself scrolling through before and after pictures of people who used the product and promptly put the clay purifying mask in my online shopping basket...where it stayed for another two weeks before I pulled the trigger.

The package arrived two days later and inside the label, it greeted me with "Hello Sexy" (printed on the inside)...which snarky as I am, I kinda liked. I used it for the first time last Wednesday (and though I probably shouldn't use it more than once a week, I had to use it again when my mom and I did makeshift facials while we were at the beach). And let me tell you what, y'all...my skin looks friggin' awesome.

Ew, right?! But morbidly wonderful...

At first I was scared it was going to burn my skin because it had a lot of different acids in it and my skin is hyper-sensitive, but it didn't. The tingling lasts for a few minutes and then fades away as it dries and sure enough...I looked like a robin's egg. But you know what? My skin has responded to the mask better and better every single time I've used it. Sure a little bump crops up as my pores clean out here and there but unlike how they were before the mask; they depart very quickly and my skin is just...glowy! I super highly recommend it.

Next on the list? Every thing they make! The hydration mask in particular! Ooh lala!

P.S. It's waaaaay cheaper from Amazon, get it here! And this is completely an unsponsored post.

Think you'll try it? I'd love to know! Have a wonderful day, y'all!

They say it's MY BIRTHDAY!!

Every day, y'all.

It's my birthday too! Yeah, so I kinda love my birthday. Der.

It's like New Year's one month and one week later. It's a time filled with hearts and red and pink and purple and the seductive whispers of spring and delightfully cold fluffy-cloud days!

I love my life and I love celebrating my birthday. I'm 33 this year. When my mother was 33 she had an awkward kid in junior high. When my grandmother was 33, she had three kids ranging from elementary school to high school. My great-grandmother had four kids in elementary school. Geeeesh.

If I'm lucky, I'll get some health insurance this year. I'm pretty low maintenance y'all, but still, I can't help but think about who I am and where I am and the life I envision for myself. It looks a hell of a lot different than my life looks now. But it's still there in the ether and in the meantime, my life in the non-ether is peacefully rad.

Anyway... all of this is to say, you don't have to wait for your birthday to celebrate the wonder of your  everyday life. You don't have to wait until the calendar pages sweep off the wall dramatically like in a movie. Just take the time to love your life. Love it's weird eccentricities. Love its swoops and gut-flipping loopty-loops.

Just love it, because it's what you have and it's worth loving.

It's worth looking at for a moment or two or a lifetime. Celebrate!

A funny thing happened on the way to the theatre...

Aquarius.

Now y'all know I've been analyzing things a bit lately. Yesterday I happened upon some information about Aquarians (I happen to be one) and I started laughing out loud and nervously adjusting an invisible tie. A lot of the things I've been trying to work through and deal with (in my attempts at growth and healing), were written right there before my eyes!

I've always kind of listened with one ear to astrology. It's fun and interesting but it isn't for everyone. Anyway, I about fell out of my chair as I read description after description (some not so nice) of my personality and some of the traits I've had troubles with. Here are a few for your enjoyment too (especially if you know me or any other Aquarians):

*"When an Aquarian stresses out about having too much to do, they typically step aside and do nothing at all." I'm super guilty of that and totally have written about it on this very blog!

*"Aquarians hate mind games. Just be straight-up with them." That is currently one of my issues with one of the situations I mentioned on Tuesday's post for heaven's sake! I get so pissed off when people play games. Passive-aggression grinds my gears like nothing else because to me, the games are so blatantly obvious and infuriating and worthless!

*"Aquarians are the most determined when it comes to honesty. If they catch you in a lie, they won't stop until they know the truth." I would add to that we also don't ask a question if we aren't prepared for the honest (sometimes painful) truth and we expect the same (perhaps unfairly sometimes) from the people we engage.

*"Aquarians will do the opposite of what you tell them to do, just to show you who's in control." I will add to that statement: "Unless we smell a trap. Then we just do whatever the hell we wanted to in the first place." We are a "special" group. And that control thing? I've totally done it in varying shades.

*"Aquarians love pleasing others, but you should expect to return the favor. They [deeply] value being treated the way they treat others." Oh yeah. The golden rule, man. It's important!

*"They find humor in a lot of things. Their funny bone gets tickled pretty easily." That could not be more true. I literally giggled as I typed this sentence.

*"Aquarians don't use the terms 'trust' or 'friend' loosely." We give a lot of chances, but when you're out yo, you are out. Period. We'll be civil, but the hands are washed, man.

*"Aquarians are more ruthless than they let on." Yep.

*"When an Aquarian gets mad, no one is safe." It takes a lot to make me mad and when I am...well, I've been told I look like the devil.

*"Aquarians will hide their jealousy. It's weakness in their eyes." I totally slapped my forehead on that one. I've never thought about it like that before but it is exactly how I view jealousy...and big, boastful egos while we're on about it!

*And here's the clincher for me, because it is absolutely my biggest pet peeve and I get all weird when it happens. "Being ignored by someone who's attention means the world to you is the worst feeling." I would add to it that "ignored" really isn't the term I'd use. It's more like if I'm speaking to you and you don't listen or tune me out, it affects us more deeply than it would anyone else [aka a normal person]."


I have to be honest, it was hard to read all the non-flattering descriptions and have them ring very true. I had a few uncomfortable "aha" moments. There were more that I didn't even want to post. But all in all, it was an interesting discovery and it's had me thinking a lot about my current trying situation (mentioned Tuesday) and about how I can handle these traits of mine that are very real and not always pleasant for others to be around. How I can handle my end of the situation in a better way.

It was also a much-needed boost to hear the positive things too. Things about being loyal, honest, truthful, sincere, and loving much more deeply than we sometimes can show. There's a lot going on in my brain and my heart and I just want to do the best and be the best me I can be.

What about y'all? Any Aquarians out there that can relate to any of those descriptions (be honest with yourself!). What sign are you and do you agree with the descriptions of traits? Do you think it's all hogwash? Do you have to admit that every now and then it hits the nail on the head? I'd love to know!

And while I'm at it, y'all, a reminder that it's okay to dig through the uncomfortable, ugly and sticky parts of our personalities. It's important to learn from mistakes, mend things and grow. Be good to yourselves and others. It's as simple as that! I truly hope you have a wonderful day!

The Quest Begins

Every year I read the amount of books for the age I am that year (awkward sentence translation: I'm 32 right now and I'm reading 32 books this year). Earlier this year I read an awesome book my mom gave me (this one). Well, it was mostly awesome- some of it was a little "I'm a middle aged, well-to-do ex-patriot living in France" (three things I most certainly am not/am not doing) but the rest of it was really great advice on the French mentality behind skincare, hair care, style and diet/exercise. It's had quite the affect on me. Particularly investing in a quality hair cut/style. 

You see, *dramatic sigh*, I had the best hairstylist, Meghan, a few years ago. I met her literally five minutes after a break up and she proceeded to give me the cutest and most flattering, easy-to-manage haircut that I kept for four years until the hubs and I moved away in 2011. Well, we've been back for three years now and I haven't been able to reconnect with her...until this week. 

Y'all I'm gonna get my groove back!!! I'm so excited and now I'm trying to find the right hairstyle for me in this point of my life.

I want it to reflect my personality (quirky, wash-and-go low maintenance, and a little rock and roll hippie). I want to look sophisticated now that I'm in my 30's, but also a bit young, a bit more hot and a dash edgy (don't want to feel like I've lost that, you know?!). So, y'all- help a chick out, here are some options I'm looking at, give me your insights if you have any! 

Facts: my hair is stick straight, but will do interesting things if layered correctly. It is baby fine, but for the handful of  badass silvery greys coming in that are crazy cat lady kinky (and I weirdly love it).

Here are the options:

#1. That hot toddy at the top of the page. It's kind of French, a little rock and roll, and a lot lady badass, with a chic spin. It's closer to the length I have right now too.

#2. Similar but a teeny bit longer and more layered. I like this one because it's kind of wispy and Chrissy Hynde-y and I LOVE me some Chrissy Hynde!

#3. The Charlotte. I've missed my long hair since I cut off 11 inches (!) in January, even though long hair can be such a pain in the ass. This would be something I'm working toward, but it's so damn sexy, right?!

What do y'all think? I'd love to know. And while I'm at it, I love the idea of taking care of yourself in this regard. It isn't trite or superficial to care for yourself and to feel confident. What do you do to care/make yourself feel confident?

I hope you have a truly wonderful day!

A Little Yummy Goodness!

My little lunch spot at The Paisley Cafe. Best butternut squash soup!

How is this week going by so quickly, y'all?! I can't believe its already Thursday! I've been working hard all week, but had an awesome day off on Tuesday. I treated myself to a lovely lunch at my favorite little spot in town with a good book and a glass of prosecco.

Well, I mentioned earlier in the week that I was trying some new smoothies this week to get some extra nutrients and a good breakfast in my tummy before I leave for work. I've been experimenting with a few recipes so I thought I'd share some of them with you!

*Sweet Greens. I make my own version of this that is very similar. I sub peaches for pear, it's just a taste preference. But man oh man! This is so good and its the best breakfast on the go. I added flax seed too and am making this a daily thing. It's just a great!

*These awesome raspberry and peach smoothies. Again, I tweak this a little for my own tastes. I mix the two together and use almond milk instead of greek yogurt (and those flax seeds are ever present). But, this is such a nice, refreshing drink. It makes a great breakfast, but I find it really fits my 3:00 pm "I'm now completely worthless to the world" energy slump quite nicely.

*This clean-eating Pumpkin Pie Oatmeal Smoothie sounds so incredible. It's healthy and yet it seems so decadent and desserty! I plan on making this as a part of my weekend "treat yo'self" awesomeness.

*This Blackberry Cherry Smoothie is perfection. I sub almond milk (der- I'm not buying thirty types of dairy to make smoothies, sorry) for coconut milk. But LAWD, it is good!!!!!

*This Hidden Veggie Breakfast Smoothie. I think you could sneak some beets in there too. I'm not the hugest beet fan in the world but they are so good for you, I have to figure out a way to trick even myself.

Do you have a go-to smoothie or healthy breakfast on the go recipe you could share? I'm always looking for new ways to be healthy while maintaining my natural ineptitude for getting out the door on time in the mornings.

I hope you take some time to try some of these. They really are delicious and it is always good to do something positive for your body.

I hope y'all have a truly wonderful day!!

Thoughts on Mistakes (Repeating/Learning from etc.)

Jay Gatsby ala Baz Lurhman's The Great Gatsby.

I spent too much money two weekends ago going out to eat several nights in a row. I was really upset with myself for being so lazy it affected my budget (greatly). I beat myself up and spent the entire week being very budget conscious (not extreme austerity, but careful). Guess what I did this weekend? I repeated the same mistakes again! Even though I didn't necessarily want to, I sure was quick to justify it! Now part of that was for social reasons and my husband's cabin fever. However, I have been so upset with myself for doing it again. I could have justified one dinner, but four?! I'm not Jay Gatsby, for crying out loud!

It got me thinking about the cycles of behavior that happen for a lot of us (well, I'm speaking directly about myself but perhaps you can relate). In other times in my life I was making far bigger mistakes than I am making now, and somehow was able to forgive myself because I knew I was struggling, growing, climbing and clawing my way up to a better existence. But why couldn't I forgive myself for two weekends of budget blow outs? What was the difference?

All I can gather is that perhaps, this was far more controllable a mistake to manage. There were no reasons other than laziness and cabin fever to speak of. I had the ability to say no every time I said yes. That's on me. It's also something that I've been so proud of lately- money management. That's why I'm so mad I could spit, I reckon. I let myself down and sabotaged my financial goals. Of course then, my mind wandered a bit to other cycles in my life that are totally controllable that I keep on repeating, the other "sabotages". Some big things, some microscopic. I chose a beer when I could have had tea and kept in tune with my health and fitness goals, for example.

 I simply do not want to repeat mistakes over and over again (I recognize that I'm a human and humans have a tendency to do that, but I want to cut as much out as is feasible). I don't want to sabotage my future goals for whatever reason I can come up with at any given moment. I want to stay true to my goals and make it happen. It's part of that "no one is going to swoop in and save me" thing.

So, this is what I'm going to do this week:

*I'm creating an adjusted grocery budget for the rest of the week so I can make delicious meals at home (and in advance) so there isn't another excuse to go out.

*Every day I keep to it, I'll transfer $20 to a separate checking account.

*At the end of the week (the tempting time for us to go out and do stuff), I'll use that money and that money only for a fun lunch or dinner with the hubs.

*I'm also going to start stashing $50 from every paycheck for the holidays. I work retail and I'm always exhausted/grumpy when it rolls around, this will be one less thing I can bitch about.

*No extraneous spending for the next week. No tchotchkes or smoothies, no candles or clothes. Nada. I've got plenty.


What are your goals? Have you ever found yourself accidentally sabotaging your goals? What do you do to keep yourself focused on your goals and not let your feelings/laziness/obligations etc. get in the way? I'd love to know!

I hope you have a truly wonderful day, y'all. Be kind to yourself!

Sunday Affirmation

Here here!!

I hope you have a truly wonderful day full of gratitude!

Love Yo'self!

My super up-close coffee scrub.

It Thursday, y'all! A good day to turn that amazing outward positive focus inward for a minute. You have to refuel your positivity, love and kindness reserves pretty regularly too, you know! Now, usually I post a bunch of fun self-care recipes and goodies here, but this week I'm doing something a teeny bit different. This week I tried one of the many recipes I've hoarded for homemade skin care products. I found this coffee scrub and decided (because I had all the ingredients in my pantry- otherwise I apparently can't be bothered) to try to duplicate it at home.

It just looks like a cup of old coffee grounds, but it's so much more!

It was awesome, if not a little messy. I don't know (or care really) about it's cellulite-banishing claims or whether it really works in that department. However, it does leave your skin feeling incredibly tingly and soft and smelling amazing.

I felt like I was brewing some artisanal hipster coffee brew though. Tub-infused lady coffee. Ew. You could make some money in Japan with that methinks. Ew again. I'll totally make this again though, it made me feel magnificently scrubbed and smooth and moisturized and it is a unisex scent so even the manliest of dudes can try it.

Give it a whirl, y'all! It took five minutes to make and the duration of a quick shower to use (preferred over an actual tubby soak because, ew ew ew!) and bada-bing, bada-boom- you've given yourself a lovely little pick-me-up.

Take the time to care for yourself today. Even if its just ten minutes. Ten minutes can be spared, I promise! It's simply ten less checks of the FaceTube, the Tweeter or whatever else you kids are doing online these days. You deserve the attention and the time, so does your psyche and- in this case, your skin.

I hope you have a truly wonderful day, y'all!

Thoughts on Loving Yourself & A Bizarro Scenario

Usually I let Thursday and Friday's posts get a bit frothy because we're inching tantalizingly close to the weekend, however today I just wanted to chat.

I don't know about y'all, but I am pretty damn hard on myself. I come by it honestly, and sometimes it has served me well. There have been times I knew I was better than a crap job, or crap friendship, or crap relationship. There are times that little voice said I really should be closer to a 4.0 GPA than I was (and I got there).  I held myself to a standard.

This voice, however, this one that tells me to push harder, be better, kinder, gentler, eat better, exercise more, not to bitch so much, get more sleep, yadda yadda yadda...It can get dark. It can be a real destroyer.

That voice has told me that my writing isn't good enough. The one thing that makes me happier than anything. It tells me that I should be further along in my career, that I should have more money saved and less debt. This voice has compared my accomplishments, or lack thereof, to others'. That voice that says I'm getting old or I'm a bad Mama to my dogs, that I haven't had babies yet or this or that. That voice I hear all the bloody time.

I'm a smart girl. Woman now I guess, if you want to get technical about it. I am smart enough to know all of this comes from a lot of places. There are the outside influences, of course. However, it's the inner ones I want to grab by the ear and sit the hell down for a good talking to. This is what I want to say to that Little Shit Voice:

------------------------------------------------
Me: Hey, you little shit. Yeah, you- the one who whispers stuff into my ears while I sleep and wakes me at three a.m. to review every bad life choice I've ever made. I know the things you tell me already, I don't need your crappy reminders."

LSV (Little Shit Voice): But you could be so much better if you just weren't so awful.

Me: I'm not awful.

LSV: You can be.

Me: Everyone can be. It's called being a human.

LSV: But you need to be better than that.

Me: Better than human? Um...like Wonder Woman?

LSV: You can always be better. I think you are lazy. I think all the bad things that people have said about you and all the things they say behind your back are true. You know you aren't as special as you think. Just think of all the horrible things you have said and done in your life! All the time you've wasted! All the stupid choices!!!

Me: Trust me, I have. But, those things aren't all of me. I know I'm good- because I work at being good every day. I know I have a lot of love to give because I try to show it every day. I know what it feels like to have your day made brighter by a stranger, so I try to do that for others.

LSV: Blah blah blah. It's not enough.

Me: I love myself more than you hate me.

LSV: But...

Me: No matter what you say, I still love myself more than you hate me. And you shouldn't hate me anyway- you're a piece of me. You are fear and regret and hurt feelings. You are insecurity and pain and so much loss. You are the pieces of my heart that broke off over the years. It's okay to feel all of it, but please don't turn it to vinegar and try to poison me. I can't let it pour out of me, it could spillover and hurt someone else. I can't do that. It hurts enough inside.

LSV: But...

Me: But nothing. I'll never get better if you keep tripping me up. Life is too short for this nonsense. I'm strong as shit. I've been through so much garbage and yes, I created some of it. But, I have a big heart always keen to love more. I want to make the world a more beautiful and positive place than it was when I got here. You get me?! I love myself more than you can ever hate me. You hear me , Little Shit Voice? Hello? Hey- where'd you go?
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Weird, right? I know it seems nuts to type out and publicly post a fake dialogue between your inner voices. I really get that. I don't care though. I didn't know what my insides were going to say until I typed them out. I surprised and impressed myself a little actually. Who knew my positive inner voice had such ovarian fortitude?!

What would your inner voices say if given a chance for dialogue? Be honest. It can be pretty harsh. Would you tell your critic to go screw off and leave you alone? Would you coddle that inner cattle prod? I know I have in the past. I know many who do. They always seem unhappy.

Sometimes it seems easier to hate yourself than to stand proudly up for yourself. It may be easier to slump than stand up straight, but trust me- it's worth the fight. It's worth the tears and the sweat and the scraped knuckles.

Stand up for the good, sweet, loving, kind, badass individual that is you. Stand up and fight for him/her. Every damn day. All day. Know you are worth the love, even if you feel it from nowhere else but inside of you. Know that even if you don't see it or feel it all around you yet, it is out there and it will find you and wonderfully encompass you if you let it. It's all around us and its radiating from inside the hearts and spirits of everyday people fighting and scraping against the voices and odds and poisons too. Just like you.

Love on, and love hard y'all. Start inside. Start today, this very moment. I promise I'm right here with you.

I truly hope you have a wonderful day!

La Musica!

Little me, cutting a rug way back when. Looks the same now, by the way.

One of the things I've realized over the years, during what I have caught myself referring to as the "dark ages" i.e. many years of a depression that varied in depth, is that music fell away from my world a lot.

Music always was something that made me happy. It was a part of my childhood, and an enormous part of my teenage and adult years. It was only recently that music began creeping in more into my life again after years of a personal music-desert (sort of). I laughed today when I realized there were months I wouldn't listen to music at all! Before I dipped into the pit, so to speak, music was on all day, every day. Nonstop. I went to concerts regularly; incredible, perspective & life-altering concerts. I sang. I dreamed actively of getting over my paralyzing fear of singing in front of people to realize a bucket list-type dream of performing. Ugh.

Throughout the "dark ages", music would slip in every now and then, particularly when there was something so good I couldn't resist it (and right when I got married there were several months of memory-making happy music), but honestly there has been or was a void inside. Lately I've realized that that void has started to fill back up with music again. The hubs and I have been listening to a lot of records on the ole turntable and playing Spotify through our television from the laptop. As I write this, in fact, Miss Lucinda Williams is crooning to me with her lovely raspy and lilting voice.

There is a magic that happens in the pit of my chest when I'm listening to the right music at the right moment. This magnificent resonance and a happy trance-like situation overcomes me and I cannot help but move my body and/or sing. I can feel my brain and spirit catching fire like sage brush during a lightning storm. It feels incredible to touch that again. To see it sitting across the room making eyes at me.

So, in honor of something so big returning to my world, here is some music that makes me happy or moves me. Share some of your favorites with me because I'd love to know!

Lucinda Williams.

Sally! (Salvatore Geloso, always takes me somewhere good & makes me miss New Orleans).

Jimmy Fallon with Meghan Trainor, saw this last week and a friend reminded me of it this week. Just makes me smile.

A few years old, but I still love it.

Another oldie, but it makes me laugh every time I watch the video and I always have the song stuck in my head afterward. 

This video just makes me happy and reminds me of great house parties back in the day.

And the perennial classic. You've heard it a million times, but listen- really listen. It's the happiest damn song!

I hope you have a truly wonderful day! Take some time to play some music that makes you happy. It can change your entire day.

Little Victories

Image from F2Images on Etsy.

Rabbit Rabbit, friends!* I hope y'all all got to have the day off today, and if you didn't- I feel your pain! But there are still victories to be celebrated, as is the plan every Monday here on P&PPS! So heeere we go!

*I incrementally bettered my fitness trek. Now there were many factors at play here: 1) PMS- I wanted fried chicken smeared in Nutella, but I didn't have it! 2) I doubled my small workout circuit I do every morning to make up for the small indulgences I did have (espresso frozen yogurt & movie popcorn because I went to see Ghostbusters in the theatre!). 3) I ate a lot of apples. 4) I got outside (in the summer?! what??!) and jogged a little. It all added up to me feeling a little feistier, a little more fit, and (embarrassing to admit) a little bit cuter. Quite frankly, I needed to feel all of it.

*I closed an old wound. If I'm particularly quiet around you, then that means I'm probably in my own world hashing out something completely unrelated to what's going on. That was my weekend, in a sense. Because I worked so much, my mind just kind of put my body on autopilot and went in to the ole mine to work some shit out. Thanks to some need inside of me that surpassed logic, I stitched up an old wound, slapped a band-aid on it, and made peace with a piece of the past. It's a big little victory.

*I chose not to be a butthole about working all weekend. I volunteered for Monday and sort of got hosed for the whole four day weekend; but I chose not to be mad, or grumpy or even bitch about it (okay, I bitched a little bit, but I tried really hard not to). I chose to have a good time at work with my associates and sell sell SELL some cardigans, even though I didn't get to spend as much time with my friends and family as I would have liked.

*I said no. In the old days, when someone would ask me out for a drink at 10 at night and I was tired or fighting a cold or had a really early day the next morning, I'd most likely still go. I didn't this week. I wanted to, but I let myself sleep instead. Did I miss my friend? Of course! But that 10 hours of sleep I got was much needed (and resulted in some wonderfully scandalous dreams!) And I know I'll get to spend some Q-time with my friend when I'm feeling a little better.

What were some of your little victories this week, friends? I'd love it if you shared some with me. Keep the positivity train chugging along!

I hope you have a truly wonderful day!

*It's good luck to say "Rabbit Rabbit" first thing in the morning when you wake up on the first of the month. It brings you good luck throughout the month. If you forget, you can say it backwards (Tibbar Tibbar) first thing to counteract any bad juju. You're little dose of Southern superstition for the day!

Saturday Meditation

The releasing of thousands of wish lanterns.

Today, friends, I want to focus on forgiveness. Not in a macro kind of "forgive me" way, but in a micro, I forgive ____ for ____ kind of way. Today I want you to find a space in nature, or in view of it. Close your eyes and clear your mind. I find that counting breaths until reaching my age works well, so I deeply breathe for 32 breaths. By the time I hit my number my mind has settled down a bit and the counting keeps it from wandering.

Now for the uncomfortable part. Once you've cleared your mind a bit, reflect on something that you've done to someone else. Say, a bad breakup at your hands that could have been handled better or getting hammered at the company picnic, or making fun of someone only to find they're standing right behind you. Ugh. Cringe. I know, right? We've all been there. I could quite possibly be the ambassador for that cringey place.

Once you have that memory in your mind, go through it. What was it that made you do that, say that, or act that way? At that company picnic, were you nervous about your new job so you kept throwing back beers even though you knew your boss was watching? Who were you trying to entertain and why when you started making fun of a person only to realize they heard you and you could see the hurt or anger on their face? What made you break up with that person the way you did? Were you being a chicken, being mean, or just at your wit's end? Really delve into your memory and find the root of why you acted in a way you are ashamed of. It's not fun, but its important to identify the reason you acted the way you did.

In all of my cases it came down to these five things: social anxiety + booze, grief, depression, being overwhelmed (usually because of not listening to my intuition) and/or fear. One of those things was in play every single time I've done something I regret. I know, we aren't supposed to have regrets, or so they tell us- but I do. And I work hard to forgive myself of all the dumb things I've done and said. Have you identified what your root(s) is in this case? Once you do, the next step is surprisingly simple...Let it go.

Release it and forgive yourself. Realize you could have made better choices and that you're human and in this situation you didn't make a good choice for _______ reason. Forgive your past self so your present and future self don't have to lug so much old shit around. I find that writing it down and then lighting the piece of paper on fire helps.  Make a pact with yourself. It could go something like this:

"Hey, regretful self?"

"Yeah, self that's trying to become a better self?"

"You know that time you made a really inappropriate joke at someone's expense at that party, and instead of letting the hurtful joke go, you repeated it...twice? And you watched the person who it was about handle it in a classy way though he/she seemed very hurt by it?"

"Ugh, don't remind me. That memory makes me feel gross."

"Well, you apologized to them. Years ago."

"Yeah, so?"

"So, forgive yourself and let it go. You're a human and humans make mistakes. You've also promised yourself not to do something like that again, even when you're in a social situation that makes you nervous and your first reaction is to crack a joke no matter the cost. Got it? Let it go, kiddo! We can't carry around all these old regrets forever, it's giving us a hunchback!!"

"I guess you're right, but I feel like punishing myself over and over for it is like a way of making up for the mistake in the first place."

"How medieval of you."

"Shut up. I know you're right. I should let it go. I promise I will try my best not to put myself or someone else in that kind of situation again."

"And if you do?"

"I'll think before I speak."

"How novel. And?"

"I'll try to keep positive thoughts and words flowing instead of letting anxiety and the need to please/entertain everybody dominate my psyche."

"And?"

"And I'll forgive myself for being rude to that person so many years ago. And- I'll release that regret."

"Well done, kiddo. Now go have a cookie." Cue the freeze frame high five!

If that embarrassing scenario sounded too detailed to be made up, it is because that's a real one for me. I did make a hurtful joke, and I did repeat it twice and I did apologize to that person years ago and still held onto that embarrassment and shame for almost a decade!! It may seem small compared to other regrets you could cull from your memory (and it is small compared to some of my life regrets) but it's a place to start. And I have to let go of that little regret in order to become more adept at forgiving myself for the big things. I hope you take the time to release something like this from your heart. You deserve inner peace, but you have to work for it; and you can't have inner peace if you're constantly at war with yourself. Be kind.

I hope you have a truly wonderful day!

Love Yo'self!

Hello friends! It is Thursday- this week seems to be flying by! Well, Thursdays around here are all about self-care and self-love. Taking care of our vessels is paramount. I don't know why it is so hard to take care of ourselves sometimes. We go out of our way for others, yet neglect the one person we are on this planet with for our entire lives! It's bananas people! Total nonsense!

So, in honor of a dear friend who needs a good reminder (you know who you are!) and to remind all of us (myself included) that we must care for ourselves well, first and foremost, before we can truly help others (like the oxygen mask situation on a plane). Heeeere we go!

*The 10 things you must tell yourself today. I really like this one!

*I love this! Kindness meditation. It's so simple and even though it's for children, I think we could all take a page from this book and nurture kindness even in the subtlest of ways. Quite frankly I think we could all take some time and relearn the lessons of childhood so we can be better adults.

*I love a list and an infographic too! Five mantras for daily self-love. I felt particularly drawn to the Nourish, Powerful & Worthy ones. Good stuff!

*Self-love is asking yourself what you need- every day- and making sure you receive it. 
Dang! I really like that!!!

*Wow! This mother/daughter Ecard actually moved me. I didn't expect that from what are usually pretty funny, snarky little throwaways. Good on you, whomever made that one! It certainly does ring true, but I think we can dream bigger than just our children (ahem- since mine don't exist yet) and do this for everyone.

*Because PMS is a bitch, and so is menopause and Mondays and traffic and screaming kids and needy people at work and...anyway- a little something something to make you feel gooooooooooood.

And to my dear friend, let me gently remind you- you are capable of training your thoughts to be kinder toward yourself. The steps you take toward breaking unhealthy and dangerous cycles now, will  benefit you so incredibly much more as you get older (take it from me- 30 ain't no joke and neither will  be 40, 50, 60 or 90! But each year gets even more awesome to make up for it!) Every little thing you do to make your body healthy, happy, and balanced (physically, emotionally and spiritually) will only aid you further along in your life. I love you.

And I love all y'all who read P&PPS. Take care of yourselves. I hope you have a truly wonderful day!

Friday Happies!

What happens when a dog goes on a Color Run!

Well, friends! How was your week? Aside from work, I spent it trying new recipes left and right with some pretty spectacular results (these fritters for one, are now a new family favorite!). For a few weeks, I've been attempting to shed the lb.'s I had put on since the big depression hit four years ago, and this week, I discovered that I lost 10% of my goal! I'm pretty excited by that, and hopeful by Thanksgiving, I'll be at my goal. Please note that it isn't a "weight" I'm aiming for, but when first starting one needs the tangible proof of progress (it helps me focus until my clothes get looser). Once that happens, no scale for me! I dislike them fervently. But anyway, that is exciting to me.

Let's keep the happies coming, eh? Get our weekends off on the right foot (I actually have a "normal" weekend this week!)! Heeeeeere we go!

*A little post-work yoga for your neck to help you de-stress on this lovely Friday night. I love the music, it's so happy!!

*I really like this idea! Especially for someone going through a particularly rough patch. It sends all kinds of good energy out there.

*This is something I would definitely do. I wonder if it would work...

*Babies Excited to See Their Parents. Aw! The one at 1:16 had me tickled!**

*This chick always impresses me.

*Hahahaha! Spirit animal!

*I'm not a sweatshirt person, but this one made me giggle!

Have a beautiful day, friends!

Love Yo'self!

Image courtesy of SFL

This week has been a successful self-care week for me. All the things I say I'm going to do or yearn to do to better care for myself, I've actually attempted. Yay! I've been rummaging through my archives online and found loads more awesome things we can do to show our bodies and spirits that we love them.

Our bodies take a beating in so many ways. Even things we can't see, like sun damage, electromagnetic energies, radiation- they are bombarding our bodies 24/7. Our spirits take a pounding from internal and external forces as well. Sometimes our inner voice is far more cruel than anything coming at you from others. Sometimes we are stuck in unhealthy situations at work or in relationships that can slowly but surely erode ours spirits.

Take control. No one will swoop in and save you. You must care for yourself. Your vessel, your heart, your spirit are all under your guardianship. Honor them in every way you can. You are worth the effort. Here are a few new ideas to help you along!

*I drink apple cider vinegar every day in a glass of pure cranberry juice and dandelion root tea. It makes my hair shiny and my skin all glowy. Here's 10 other ways to use it!

*Eat these fresh and fruity salsas while the produce is still so fresh and delicious!

*I'm saving my pennies for a jar of this stuff, but I'm trying this in the meantime.

*Tapping for stress relief. Intriguing!

*I think I'm going to make this sometime next week. Not necessarily for the hair loss, but it sounds so luxurious! Do you think you would try it?

*I've had stretch marks since I was thirteen. Yay, genetics! I think I'm going to give this a whirl too. Hope is a beautiful thing, isn't it?

*The one thing my husband and I always try to do for ourselves is keep nice candles in the house. Is that silly? Maybe. But, there is something about it that makes us feel like we are really on the path we want to be (after years of tough times). We don't go shopping, we rarely go out to eat, haven't been to a movie in three years...yet, we procure one nice, lovely-smelling candle every other month or so to keep a peaceful ambiance in the house. I have the Marine scented version of this right now and I absolutely love it.

Do y'all have any self-care secrets or treatments or things you do to show yourself love? I'd like to hear them!

I hope you have a truly wonderful day!

Yummy Sanctuaries

Image courtesy of A Cozy Kitchen.

I love food. I used to be more of a "eat to live" person but have steadily grown into a "lives to eat" type of gal over the years. I've mentioned before that Dionysus blessed me heartily with a love of good food and good drinks. Glazes, cocktails, sauces, round robust mushrooms exploding with flavor,  creamy melty cheeses, tangy pomegranate seeds popping in your mouth! Oh my goodness, I could go on (and on and on and on!)

The thing is, I work with a lot of people that do not have this relationship with food. It is simply sustenance. Well, I'm here to tell you sustenance doesn't have to be microwaved or boring. It can be fresh and delicious and give you the boost you need to make better choices for yourself as each opportunity presents itself. Feeding yourself is a spiritual act as well as a physical act. You are giving yourself fuel, energy and what you shove down that gullet of yours can determine what kind of energy you've got going on there.

So for this lovely Tuesday, here are some easy, cheap, healthy and fantastic meal and beverage ideas for you. I hope you can incorporate some into your week to perhaps give you a shove toward the positive.

*For these last weeks of summer, Blueberry Cucumber Salad with Feta and Lemon. I'd probably sub goat cheese because, well- goat cheese is my jam. Doesn't that sound so fresh and lovely?! Make a big batch and separate it into containers for easy-grab lunch sides. Particularly when you find yourself in a drab, windowless office for an extremely short lunch break...just me? Ha!

*I make this regularly and I love it. It's easy to make vegetarian too, if that's how you roll. Get it? Roll? Because it's on a roll! I crack myself up. But seriously, it's delicious.

*Roasted Grape Ricotta Crostinis with Rosemary and Pine Nuts. Oh de-lolly! That sounds magnificent. I'm making this this week! So damn easy, it's bananas!

*Growing up, I never had a healthy relationship with cauliflower. As I've delved more into luxuriously eating on the cheap, I've found that cauliflower is a bad ass. It is such a diverse vegetable. Sweet and nutty, just like me! These baked cauliflower bites look divine! Bake some of those up on a Sunday and have a popcorn shrimp-like situation all week long!

*Need a sweet treat? Check these beautiful bitches out. I'mma have to take all them, kthanks!

*Thirsty? Try this Cucumber Lemonade Mocktail.

*Or perhaps something a bit naughtier...

Do you have any healthy "quick-fixes" that you enjoy? I'd love to know! Share below!

I hope you have a truly wonderful day!

Poison-Free Sunday!

Image courtesy of Pinterest.

It will happen inevitably. Someone will make a snarky comment aimed to hurt you. Most of the time, if you work at it, you can learn to deflect these things. A comment on your job performance, weight, looks, laugh, feet, family! It's all up for grabs for "mean" people to try to bring you down, it seems. The reality is, in an attempt to distract from their own issues (which are most likely far worse then they are even trying to make you feel) they sling negativity around to see what sticks. Some don't realize they're doing it on a conscious level. That's sad (and all too familiar in my experiences).

But, it's still a bit sick and I've known so many of these people. At one point or another we've all been that person too. Ugh, it's embarrassing to admit. However, take some time today to really evaluate who it is that is throwing the proverbial spaghetti noodles against the wall (if it's you, then that's a whole other post, stay tuned!). Who is it, and why the hell are you listening to them? What power do you allow them to actually have over you?

And once you look at them objectively and see where their bile comes from, it is easier to release the anger they made (or attempted to make) you feel. The self-doubt too. Let it go, knowing that no one, NO ONE, is allowed the power to control the way you feel about yourself except you. Even if they are a parent, a spouse, a sibling, best friend, coworker or acquaintance. Really, no one is allowed to do that to you. You control how they make you feel.

Don't lose those sixty seconds of happiness. It's human to get angry, of course, but don't let someone dominate you with cruelty. Don't drink their poison. Be kind to yourself. Be kind and/or civil to them.  Establish and know your boundaries. Let them go, fill that space with affirming thoughts and fun things to do and be. Pretty soon, you'll be too busy living a fulfilling life to let the bastards get you down.

May you have a truly wonderful Sunday!

Love Yo'self!

I enjoy that Colbie Caillet's video and song, "Try", is getting attention for empowering today's youths with body-loving pride. But I, being a child of the 80's & 90's, immediately was reminded of a song and artist (Natalie Merchant) who blew our young, impressionable and bepimpled faces off in  the summer of '95 with this female-centric, spirit-based song, Wonder. Enjoy it with me, kiddos. Don't just skip it. Of course the video is a little cliche, all these kinds of videos can be...but the lady cutting out paper chain dolls (a dying art- I loved doing that as a kid!!) and making them dance together...I have to say, it moved me. I hadn't listened to that song aside from the random playings at the grocery store, since I had the album Tigerlily playing nonstop back in the day (sometimes I really miss the 90's!).

Give the lyrics a listen too, or look them up and give them a read. "Fate smiled and destiny, laughed as she came to my cradle, know this child will be able. Laughed as my body she lifted, know this child will be gifted. With love, with patience, and with faith. She'll make her way.*". It has so much merit and it made me a more confident and positive woman today. See if it helps you too. Honor yourself, honor the little miracles we were, and have grown to be.

I hope you have a truly wonderful day!



*Personal note, not all faith is religious obviously, but sometimes a reminder is needed. Sometimes it can be faith in others, in tomorrow. Faith in humanity. Faith in ourselves. Faith in love, and most definitely in hope.

Little Things

Image courtesy of my awesome Pinterest board.

Last week I talked about a few of my little victories in life. It's nothing earth-shattering, however, those little victories add up to so much change so very quickly, it can be astounding! Here is a handful of mine this week, reminders that not all is lost if you slip up here and there (and have that third glass of wine- hiccup!)

*I was having a blue day. Shit happens, you know? Weird dreams partnered with a wicked sinus headache. I knew I was going to be working with someone on the job that has been a psychic and emotional drain lately. I let the negativity in a little bit; but on the way to work, I gave myself a pep talk. I literally quoted myself from this blog to myself. Weird? Maybe. I need this blog just as much as anyone else reading. Anyway- I got into work and I fought the negativity. It took a lot more effort because I had already let it in, but I did it smile after smile. Mantra after mantra, I plowed through eight hours of needy clients and stayed positive. Even when two clients insulted me several times, by the time they left I had them smiling and telling me to "stay fun". I'd say that's a victory- and I didn't feel like wadded up street garbage by the time I got off work either. Huzzah! Oh- and that co-worker I was worried about? She was inexplicably in a good mood all day...huh! Wonder why?

*I ignored a few negativity traps. Do you know what these are? I bet you do. You can almost sense a set up for them, particularly when you are trying to practice peace and positivity. A co-worker asks: "How're you doing today?" and you can hear it in their voice that they want to complain when you turn around and say "Fine, how are you?". Instead of falling into one of those, I decided to say "FANTASTIC!" or "I'm really doing well! How about you? I bet your night off was wonderful!". It disarmed the negativity traps and forced them to attempt to make more pleasant small talk. I've been a beast of negativity in these situations in the past, using my sarcasm to bitch about this or that because I didn't like my job (or this or that or another thing). Of' course there are the ones who will say, "HORRIBLE. Everything went wrong!". In those cases, I find its best and easiest to say something along the lines of: "Oh that's a shame! I hope that you have a much better day today." or simply smile and say: "I'm sorry to hear that." and walk away. The best way to remove a negativity monster from your presence is to starve it. Don't play with them. Those bastards bite, and they are venomous. Truck on like a boss with positivity shooting out from your fingers and toes and smile!!

*I didn't buy the thing. My husband and I are on a budget. Well, der- everyone is these days. But I've got a plan. A nest egg plan and a debt-free plan. I'm a bit of a terrier about these things usually but haven't been for a few years because Depression and Dionysus blessed me heartily with an exhausted set of coping mechanisms and deep love of pleasure and wine and good food (Oh yeah, and laziness). When I'm bored at work or running late, or tired on my way home I'll often stop and pick up a thing. A quick-fix lunch, a wine or beer, a dinner out when I don't feel like cooking, a thing I don't need but just feel I deserve. I didn't buy the thing this week! Well, in full disclosure, I did twice (beer for the hubs- but I did that on the cheap so, snaps!). But twice out of the potential of possibly 19 times (and way more monies). That's pretty great. I saved beaucoup bucks. I didn't feed the shame spiral of spending more than I should or regretting this or that. Just that will help me feel stronger and more capable and confident for the upcoming week! I'll take that 89% success rate instead of the 11% not-failing rate, yes sir'ee.


 Did you have any little victories this week? I'd love to know, please share below!

I hope you have a truly wonderful day, y'all. Cheers!